‘The Stories that Bind Us’

'Families may want to create a mission statement similar to the ones many companies use to identify their core values.' Courtesy of Sarah Williamson Via The New York Times

Digital Diaspora Family Reunion is focused on illuminating the wealth of visual images that speak to the personal narratives that we tell ourselves and those we love about Who we are, Where we come from, What is important to us, and How we have made our way through this journey that is Life. Photographs help to fill in the missing pieces within the larger narrative that is our collective cultural history, as well, which helps to enlarge our understanding of the times we live in. Recently, an intriguing article in the New York Times shined some light on the critical importance that these personal narratives have in helping us to make sense of the often confusing swirl that is our tumultuous world. Squirreled away somewhere in our homes is an archive of images that speak to the stories that bind us. Share them often with those around you and be sure to share them with us, too!

New York Times

The Stories That Bind Us

By BRUCE FEILER

March 15, 2013

“What is the secret sauce that holds a family together? What are the ingredients that make some families effective, resilient, happy? It turns out to be an astonishingly good time to ask that question. The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative.”

“I first heard this idea from Marshall Duke, a colorful psychologist at Emory University. In the mid-1990s, Dr. Duke was asked to help explore myth and ritual in American families.’There was a lot of research at the time into the dissipation of the family,’ he told me at his home in suburban Atlanta. ‘But we were more interested in what families could do to counteract those forces.'”

On February 23, 2013, DDFR Roadshow hosted a Grand Finale event in cooperation with The Schomburg Center for Research in Black Culture, for a Black History Month Special focusing on "Harlem's Treasures." Tatiyana Jenkins was named one of those Treasures.

“Around that time, Dr. Duke’s wife, Sara, a psychologist who works with children with learning disabilities, noticed something about her students. ‘The ones who know a lot about their families tend to do better when they face challenges,’ she said. Her husband was intrigued, and along with a colleague, Robyn Fivush, set out to test her hypothesis. They developed a measure called the ‘Do You Know?’ scale that asked children to answer 20 questions.”

“Examples included: Do you know where your grandparents grew up? Do you know where your mom and dad went to high school? Do you know where your parents met? Do you know an illness or something really terrible that happened in your family? Do you know the story of your birth?”

“Dr. Duke and Dr. Fivush asked those questions of four dozen families in the summer of 2001, and taped several of their dinner table conversations. They then compared the children’s results to a battery of psychological tests the children had taken, and reached an overwhelming conclusion. The more children knew about their family’s history, the stronger their sense of control over their lives, the higher their self-esteem and the more successfully they believed their families functioned. The ‘Do You Know?’ scale turned out to be the best single predictor of children’s emotional health and happiness.

A student from Brooklyn College holds photograph during the Brooklyn College Roadshow, 2012.

Students from Brooklyn College share their family pictures and stories, 2012.

Students from Thomas Jefferson High school share their family pictures and stories in DDFR Roadshow, 2012.

“Decades of research have shown that most happy families communicate effectively. But talking doesn’t mean simply ‘talking through problems,’ as important as that is. Talking also means telling a positive story about yourselves. When faced with a challenge, happy families, like happy people, just add a new chapter to their life story that shows them overcoming the hardship. This skill is particularly important for children, whose identity tends to get locked in during adolescence.”

“The bottom line: if you want a happier family, create, refine and retell the story of your family’s positive moments and your ability to bounce back from the difficult ones. That act alone may increase the odds that your family will thrive for many generations to come.”

To read the complete article, please visit “The Family Stories That Bind Us

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